It's Still Life

The Poll Deed Form
(Or: A Feline Declaration of Independence)

Question 4: Reason for name change.

The cat hesitates.
Taps the pen.
Stares out the window.
Sighs — a deep, theatrical sigh,
the kind that shifts tectonic plates
and alerts the neighbours.

Then he writes:

“I have outgrown the name I was given by a shed and a previous life.
I am no longer the cat who was found.
I am the cat who found himself.
I am Knut —
named for a Danish king,
a polar bear,
and the sound a sardine tin makes
when it opens
in anticipation.”

“This name reflects my true nature:
regal,
salted,
and occasionally ferocious
when disturbed during naps.

Also, the old name was overused
by the crow
in a mocking tone,
and I have tired of his
inadequate impressions.”

He signs it with a paw print.
Then he adds:

“Also — it’s shorter.
Which means less time
waiting for humans
to say it.
Efficiency counts.”