It's Still Life

THE SEAGULL DEBACLE (Part 2)
(A Lesson in Avian Betrayal & Feline Accounting)

The seagull —whose name is Keith
and whose morals are negotiable
agrees to the terms:

One dramatic dive,
one defaced sign,
one endless chip buffet.

He swoops.
He squawks.
He… misses.

The S in “FOR SALE” now bears a chalky, dubious streak.
It reads: “FOR ALE.”

The cat stares.
“You defaced… the letter?
I wanted ‘NOT FOR SALE’!
Or ‘CURSED’!
Or at least ‘VERY HAUNTED’!
This just makes it sound like…
a pub.”

Keith lands, shuffling his feet.
“Hey, mate. It’s art.
Abstract.
Provocative.
Now … me chips.”

The cat’s tail flicks.
“The deal was defaced sign.
This is… alphabetical vandalism.
A typographic adjustment.
No chips.”

Keith squawks in outrage.
“A deal’s a deal!
I risked my neck!
Well, my feathers!
Chips!”

The cat turns his back,
licking a paw with deliberate calm.
“Read the fine print, Keith.
It said ‘satisfactory defacement’.
This is not satisfactory.
This is… literary.”

As Keith protests,
the Old Woman peers out the window,
sees the sign,
and bursts out laughing.

“FOR ALE?” she calls.
“Did you two open a brewery?”

The cat sniffs.
“He did.
I am merely…
a disappointed investor.”