
Part 2: The Cat Explains Shorting Futures to the Old Woman
the catβstill not hers,
and never will beβ
strikes a dow-er pose
and explains shorting.
βyou borrow a tuna can today (worth 10),
sell it immediately,
then wait for the price to crash to 5.
you buy back the same can for 5,
return it to the lender,
and pocket the difference.β
βthank youβi think,β the old woman nods,
and tucks her gratitude
into her reasons not to burn the world today, filed between long naps and good coffee.
the cat, ever the pedant,
adds a footnote:
βalso: shorting works on mice,
but the ethics are murky.β
the crow drops a stolen Wall Street for Animals pamphlet:
next lesson: hostile takeovers
(see: birdfeeders, 2019)
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