It's Still Life

The Old Woman and Appendix C: Loopholes as love language

the old woman underlines:
“by consuming this product, you agree
to everything found in
spite, loopholes, and
the neighbour’s unsecured wifi.”

the cat (still not hers, legally speaking)
paws at clause 4.2: liability for falling objects—
“define object,” it scoffs,
knocking over a vase.
“define falling.”

the crow, ever the contract killer,
drops black’s law dictionary into the soup—
“amend force majeure to include
impromptu naps—it’s an act of god.”

by dinnertime, the old woman has:
— redacted all pronouns (too personal)
— replaced shall with might (purely out of spite)
— scribbled in the margin:
“i hereby agree to nothing.
especially not this.”